Laws of Life

Stang849 · 02-15-2008, 09:09 AM

LAW OF MECHANICAL REPAIR
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.

LAW OF THE WORKSHOP
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

LAW OF PROBABILITY
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

LAW OF THE TELEPHONE
If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

LAW OF THE ALIBI
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

VARIATION LAW
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

LAW OF THE BATH
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

LAW OF CLOSE ENCOUNTERS
The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

LAW OF THE RESULT
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

LAW OF BIOMECHANICS
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

LAW OF THE THEATER
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

LAW OF COFFEE
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

LAW OF LOCATION
No matter where you go, there you are.

LAW OF LOGICAL ARGUMENT
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

BROWN'S LAW
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.

OLIVER'S LAW
A closed mouth gathers no feet.

WILSON'S LAW
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

DOCTORS' LAW
If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.

94Dodge Truggy · 02-15-2008, 09:39 AM

Maybe this is why I never really cared about laws!

02-15-2008, 09:09 AM	#1
Stang849 Stinkin Bastige Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Anderson Twp. Posts: 178 Images: 236	Laws of Life LAW OF MECHANICAL REPAIR After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee. LAW OF THE WORKSHOP Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. LAW OF PROBABILITY The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act. LAW OF THE TELEPHONE If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal. LAW OF THE ALIBI If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire. VARIATION LAW If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now (works every time). LAW OF THE BATH When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings. LAW OF CLOSE ENCOUNTERS The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with. LAW OF THE RESULT When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will. LAW OF BIOMECHANICS The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach. LAW OF THE THEATER At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last. LAW OF COFFEE As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold. LAW OF LOCATION No matter where you go, there you are. LAW OF LOGICAL ARGUMENT Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about. BROWN'S LAW If the shoe fits, it's ugly. OLIVER'S LAW A closed mouth gathers no feet. WILSON'S LAW As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it. DOCTORS' LAW If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.

02-15-2008, 09:39 AM	#2
94Dodge Truggy EX-Vice President Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Fairfield, Ohio Posts: 3,048	Maybe this is why I never really cared about laws!